Wedding Guests

[CuriousPete]

As a foreigner getting married to an indonesian, alot of my family members cannot attend from overseas but our wedding is for 500 people and most are from the brides side. However I have too few family members or anyone from my side coming, so i was wondering if there is some wedding guest rental service where i can pay random strangers from attending my wedding in exchange for money. But where I can choose what race, names etc they need to have. Just want to rent guests like only around 15-20 people. Do such services exist ? As in Japan, China and Korea such services exist. I was wondering if its possible in Indonesia.

 

[Shadrach]

As a foreigner getting married to an indonesian, alot of my family members cannot attend from overseas but our wedding is for 500 people and most are from the brides side. However I have too few family members or anyone from my side coming, so i was wondering if there is some wedding guest rental service where i can pay random strangers from attending my wedding in exchange for money. But where I can choose what race, names etc they need to have. Just want to rent guests like only around 15-20 people. Do such services exist ? As in Japan, China and Korea such services exist. I was wondering if its possible in Indonesia.

Where is the wedding taking place? What race do you want?

 

[CuriousPete]

Where is the wedding taking place? What race do you want?

bali and east asians

 

[jstar]

No that ’service’ does not exist here.

I’ve done my part of wedding parties / receptions and besides a couple of tables for the real close family practically nobody knows each other. They find out who they’re sharing the table with (“Hmm, so you were paid to attend this?”) even if the paid actors need to hide it of course. And in case of a (standing) buffet it’s really mixed and chaotic. So no one will notice how many from this or that side; it’s all between the ears.

Spend your money on something useful. Flying in some close friends who can’t afford it for instance.

 

[Balifrog]

Can't understand this madness about having 500 guests at a wedding, and spending a fortune for it...
I assisted at my companion's son wedding, Hindu wedding, a hamlet South of Banyuwangi.
I expexted to stay relax in the background, but the elder brother picked me up and said "in the village you are Mama's husband, so you go front stage and play the role"...
Fascinating experience. The bride theeths being filed, a bit of hair from the newly weds, the Miss, me, the elder brother all mixed in jar, walking on the stones, carrying the coconuts on the shoulders etc...
All this in front of a kind of priest or shaman right out of a Crocodile Dundee movie...
I understand the symbolics of each step, but still very stresfull when you are the only bule in front of a 100 locals...
Later it's the speech, signature ceremony.
Lasted from 09:00 till 16:00, I was exhausted.
After that i took refuge in my man's cave and had a few Bintangs !

 

[Shadrach]

Can't understand this madness about having 500 guests at a wedding, and spending a fortune for it...
I assisted at my companion's son wedding, Hindu wedding, a hamlet South of Banyuwangi.
I expexted to stay relax in the background, but the elder brother picked me up and said "in the village you are Mama's husband, so you go front stage and play the role"...
Fascinating experience. The bride theeths being filed, a bit of hair from the newly weds, the Miss, me, the elder brother all mixed in jar, walking on the stones, carrying the coconuts on the shoulders etc...
All this in front of a kind of priest or shaman right out of a Crocodile Dundee movie...
I understand the symbolics of each step, but still very stresfull when you are the only bule in front of a 100 locals...
Later it's the speech, signature ceremony.
Lasted from 09:00 till 16:00, I was exhausted.
After that i took refuge in my man's cave and had a few Bintangs !

This all sounds crazy. He wants only SEAsians as his ( family) where is this guy from? His wife is Indonesian. I would absolutely hate being around 500 people for this. Sounds like it's going to cost a fortune. For a Future ExWife!

 

[gemima]

I think us "western" foreigners dont understand this dilemma.
I saw a video blog from an american lady living in China earlier today and apparently its really common to pay for "friends" or even bridesmaids at your wedding there.
In Indonesia they seem to follow the pattern of not paying for wedding guests (apart from them sometimes seeming to desire to have foreigners in attendance).

Op i dont think you can find a service for this here because those people will be foreigners and need a kitas to work here. Maybe you could hire some models via their agency as they do have permits or find an east asian community in Bali and see if any of them want a free meal and a party (you might get a good response!). Good luck.

 

[jstar]

No that’s not a common practice in China. You see it sometimes in South Korea and Japan but even there it’s rather rare.

What you do see, is that many people stop attending weddings because the expected gift amounts (the infamous envelopes) are getting too high.

 

[Helpful Herbert]

I had 600 and was the only bule there.

No that’s not a common practice in China. You see it sometimes in South Korea and Japan but even there it’s rather rare.

What you do see, is that many people stop attending weddings because the expected gift amounts (the infamous envelopes) are getting too high.

I remember at my wedding some of the envelopes we received were empty

 

[Hawk256]

I had 600 and was the only bule there.

I remember at my wedding some of the envelopes we received were empty

Same story here except we ended up with 1,000 people. I was told originally 150 then it was moved to 300. When I looked at the sign in sheet it was right at 1,000. Something tells me the attendance was updated without telling me. No problem but standing there for 3 hours shaking hands was pretty rough.

No empty envelopes but some did have 2,000 IDR in them. No where near a break even point with the envelopes. I have heard of some people making a profit on their wedding in Thailand from all the envelopes.

 

[Balifrog]

I had 600 and was the only bule there.

I remember at my wedding some of the envelopes we received were empty

Surprising as, at the Missus son wedding there where 2 "counters" (male/female, 80% of the village is muslim) the attendant opens the enveloppe, counts the money and record it in a book with the name of the person.

The idea being that if there is a marriage at that donor's family you will give the equivalent. Given less you are cheap charlie, giving much more you make them lose face

This "donation" happens during the reception in the evening.
It is same in Thailand.
I have pictures of these books but as there are names on them I won't post it.
The amounts are mainly 30/40 k with a few 100k.

 

[harryopal1]

Living in Sitiawan,which was then a village, northern Malaysia there was a largish family of very poor people who made a living by attending funerals where they were often paid and got free meals. Having a larger group of mourners was a tribute to the importance of the deceased. There was a double decker bus that would weave its way to the cemetery and on top was a band playing dixieland jazz.

 

[Jaime C]

I had 600 and was the only bule there.

I remember at my wedding some of the envelopes we received were empty

We received a couple with 5000 in the envelope. We had a nice wedding reception at a hotel in Bekasi. Nothing over the top. I was the only bule there. I think we went from 200 to 300 at the last minute. About 250 showed up.

 

[Bob]

Living in Sitiawan,which was then a village, northern Malaysia there was a largish family of very poor people who made a living by attending funerals where they were often paid and got free meals. Having a larger group of mourners was a tribute to the importance of the deceased. There was a double decker bus that would weave its way to the cemetery and on top was a band playing dixieland jazz.

Were they Cajun Malaysian? I've seen jazz played at a funeral reception in Saigon but not elsewhere that I recall.

 

[harryopal1]

Were they Cajun Malaysian? I've seen jazz played at a funeral reception in Saigon but not elsewhere that I recall.

I think they were Chinese.

 

[jstar]

In South Vietnam it was taken over from the marching bands of the French military a hundred years ago. They’re all Catholic.

 

[melvintee]

bali and east asians

Im a Singaporean but pretty good at role playing. Do i need to audition for the part? I can bring my family with me so that's 4 of us.

 

[Shadrach]

I know some Martians in disguise as Malaysians! they are very good at role playing. Should I give them a call on my Spacephone?