Hello, I'm a new member, Is it appropriate to ask where one could meet a nice Indonesian girl? I'm looking for a solid relationship, not a fling, I'm in the market for good wife material. Can anyone steer me in the right direction? I don't want to join any fake dating sites, alreadty tried that, all fake and scammers. Any help from somone wise to let me know. Thank you for your consideration.
INFORMATION AND COMMUNITY FOR EXPATS IN INDONESIA
Looking for a good Indonesian girl.
- Thread starter duke
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Are you already in Indonesia? If you are Christian, you could try going to one of the English-speaking churches in the area. I do not know about other religions, but if you are Christian, church is a good place to look for women who have similar goals to yours.
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Hire a good housekeeper. If she doesn't steal from you, takes care of your living area without complaint, cooks for you as you like, marry her.
Interesting. What does it cost in USD to hire a housekeeper?
duke
JoinedFeb 19, 2024Messages4
No way do I trust anyone, especially a woman. They are fickle and totally unpredictable, one day they love you the next they're banging the plumber and telling him what a bad man you are while cleaning his pipes. Never trust a woman they're trecherious. Make your mind up kid, you want to marry one but you don't trust them?
That is correct sir. Trust is earned, not given indiscriminately.
Shadrach
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This is a funny post! A person can meet nice Indonesian girls and women every day here, but that doesn't mean you can find one in the market as you say! You make it sound like you are buying a piece of furniture, ( Good Wife Material)! Do you want a girl, or a woman? from what I've seen due to customs the Bali women are off limits to foreigners! Only Javanese women seem to hook up with westerners. I have never attempted to connect with an Indonesian woman, so I have no experience in this field. Many of the other expats on here seem to be married. If they are married to an Indonesian woman they can give you better advice on finding good wife material!
You know, there are more than two ethnicities in Indonesia. Women from most if not all of those groups, even Balinese, are known to marry foreigners.
How old?
It was more than a legend. Whether it's still in practice I don't know.From Madura I heard or is that just a legend
Like in other countries, meeting someone who could potentially become your life partner in Indonesia is a highly personal, and there isn't a one-size-fits-all answer. But, as others have suggested, a good place to start is to attend social gatherings, parties, or events where you can meet a lot of new people of the opposite sex. This could be anything from cultural events, language classes, charity initiatives, social clubs, or sports groups. If you search in Facebook there are reasonable number social gathering event in Jakarta.
Another possibility is to attend religious events at local churches. But keep in mind that over 87% of Indonesian people are Muslim.
Additionally, attending Indonesian language classes or finding language exchange partners for mutual benefit might be useful. You can learn Indonesian while helping someone else learn your native language.
If you want to meet hot, young, good-looking Indonesian girls, as someone else has suggested, go to clubs / bars around Kemang in Jakarta, such as Eastern Promise. There are a lot of gold diggers out there, but you might find classy lady as well.
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My husband started that way, too. Before we met, that is.
I do know a couple who had been together for 15 years now and she was one of the bar maids there. Guess he was one of the lucky bunch.
Ok.
This is from an old Indonesian woman who had dated many foreigners (all colours, you name it, I had it) before settling down.
1. Indonesian girls are wild in the sense that you have to be ready with the emotional rollercoaster coming from her side, if you're lucky, IF! You might even find one that is wild in bed as well, But that is the big IF. You really need to weed it out personally.
2. Our Asian and religious background makes most Indonesian are very much family-oriented. I don't know nowadays but I still hear couples breaking up because he/she doesn't want to convert or my family disagree or my family wanted me to be with XYZ.
3. Having said #2 above, when you're marrying an Indonesian, you also marry the whole family. There is even a tribe that does not allow anyone from their tribe to marry outside. Although now, they circumvent it by "adopting" the person that wanted to get into their tribe and give them their tribal name so that the person become a member of the said tribe, too.
4. I don't know where you come from, but if you're white, Indonesians in general will see you as a walking ATM. I know that not everyone has that mentality, but most are. and if you're black, they'll think you're a drug mule or smuggler. I was lucky enough to meet young African diplomats and an African mobile phone network developer who started working for a big ISP company in Jakarta (that was 20 years ago).
5. To make your chance in getting an Indonesian girl, you have to learn to local language. How? By going to Indonesian language school. Indonesians are soooo happy when foreigners speak our language.
6. Once you find an Indonesian girl you want to marry, what do you want to do? Are you going to bring her to your home country? Or are you going to stay here? You know that Asians are not just Indonesia, right?
harryopal1
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While Ilovered's generalizations may well be true, as with all generalizations there are always exceptions. Been married now to an Indonesian national for almost 10 years. We are what you might call seniors or elderly. Met on line and then met in person here in Bali the following year. The family is what would be called middle class so am not expected to support other family. We had a simple Islamic wedding ceremony to make the mother happy but I am not a practicing Muslim.
When using an Asian online dating site, every day I would get a dozen or more young women up to 40 years younger saying I was perfect; mostly Filipinos. Eventually met up with wife, who was previously married and had two adult children. She had committed to seeing her children through university before looking for a new relationship so certainly not wild.
When using an Asian online dating site, every day I would get a dozen or more young women up to 40 years younger saying I was perfect; mostly Filipinos. Eventually met up with wife, who was previously married and had two adult children. She had committed to seeing her children through university before looking for a new relationship so certainly not wild.
If you are gone marrie in a mixed culture, then you also have to consider many other aspects, besides the 'good girl' thing. Those things are: language, education, sozial and financial stand, city or village girl, future place to live.
Further, a wife from another culture places great demands on you too. You have to be ready to dive deep in here culture, learn her language, go along with here family and tradition and so on. Don't forget, if you take her out of her culture and if you're gone live in another country, she will have minor chances at the job market because of language problems and foremost because of the work attitude. It's a bit different here.
It can run, but mostly people underestimate the coming difficulties. Good luck !
Further, a wife from another culture places great demands on you too. You have to be ready to dive deep in here culture, learn her language, go along with here family and tradition and so on. Don't forget, if you take her out of her culture and if you're gone live in another country, she will have minor chances at the job market because of language problems and foremost because of the work attitude. It's a bit different here.
It can run, but mostly people underestimate the coming difficulties. Good luck !
Well, I agree with some of the above "statements" and disagree with many.
Personal history :
First of all I have close to 30 years experience living in.Asia.
Was married with a Thai "good middle class" women, had 3 kids together, all grown up. We separated but are still in touch. Western educated, fluent French.
The best of both world.
Later on I worked.in HKG, met an Indo girl, we lived together there for over 2 years.
Comes my decision to retire (64), and I simply said her that I am.done in HKG, so she has 2 choices
So we arrived in Bali 6 years ago, are still together.
She was not what you call a "good girl" and I was a wild party animal going through alcohol and girls, a perfect fit in fact as long both parties.decide to "settle down"
Things were.made clear from the start :
Well, it's working. Probably we have both "done it all" and have calmed down.
We arranged our lives 2 months together, 1 month separate. Works very well.
Note that when we met (8 y ago) she was 43 and I 60, so it's not the thing about the pensioner "catching" a 25 y old girl...
Cheers !
Personal history :
First of all I have close to 30 years experience living in.Asia.
Was married with a Thai "good middle class" women, had 3 kids together, all grown up. We separated but are still in touch. Western educated, fluent French.
The best of both world.
Later on I worked.in HKG, met an Indo girl, we lived together there for over 2 years.
Comes my decision to retire (64), and I simply said her that I am.done in HKG, so she has 2 choices
- she stays with me and I'll give it a try in Bali (forget about the jungle village..)
- she prefers to stay in.HKG and it's end of story.
So we arrived in Bali 6 years ago, are still together.
She was not what you call a "good girl" and I was a wild party animal going through alcohol and girls, a perfect fit in fact as long both parties.decide to "settle down"
Things were.made clear from the start :
- there will never be a marriage, a house.or land or car purchase or kids.
- I understand the family thing, but they are YOUR family, not mine and they will never interfere in our live.
- you have your religion / tradition (Hindu), I have mine.
- we dont touch each others freedom
Well, it's working. Probably we have both "done it all" and have calmed down.
We arranged our lives 2 months together, 1 month separate. Works very well.
Note that when we met (8 y ago) she was 43 and I 60, so it's not the thing about the pensioner "catching" a 25 y old girl...
Cheers !
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