Funny Stuff - Meme, humour (dark white, orange, rainbow), stories..

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I was having sex with a girl the other day and I asked her politely to get on top.
She said, "You haven't raped many women, have you?

If I wanted to commit suicide from a height, I'd jump off my ego to my IQ. It's a long way down.

I believe in non-prophet organizations. That's why I'm an atheist.
 
What if Stephen Hawking is the real slim shady but we will never know because he cant stand up ?
 
No matter how much you push the envelope, it'll still be stationery.

So what if I can’t spell Armageddon? It’s not the end of the world.
 
‘I saw a fat person wearing a sweatshirt with ‘Guess’ on it.

I said ‘Thyroid problem?”
 
I met an Ozzie guy in the pub who was looking forlorn...I asked "What's up mate?"
He replied his girlfriend had been sunbathing nude and got stung on the pussy and it had swollen shut!'
I commiserated and said "Bummer mate."
He gulped his beer and said "Great idea mate...thanks!" and left.
 

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