Jokes

[Helpful Herbert]

Finally, the origin of my user name gets a mention on this site!

 

[pantaiema]

Walking around Jakarta for a short distance less than 1km (say). You would not believe it until you know the reason why and you see the terrain....

During his recent visit to Jakarta, a person approached the hotel reception seeking directions to a nearby shopping mall. Despite the apparent proximity on the map, when he inquired, "How far is it on foot?" the receptionist's eyes widened in astonishment. Walk ?? It seemed she couldn't fathom the idea of a 'bule' choosing to walk.

Another story:
A tourist unfamiliar with the bustling streets of Jakarta embarked on a leisurely stroll from Senayan Plaza to the nearby Mulia Hotel, a distance of merely less than one kilometer. Unbeknownst to him, his casual walk transformed him into an impromptu Pied Piper, captivating a group of urchins who trailed behind him like a devoted entourage. This unusual spectacle baffled a vigilant security guard, who rushed across the street to extricate the disoriented tourist from the growing crowd, exclaiming with concern, "Pak, you don't walk around here."

Those familiar with the Indonesian people and the geography of Jakarta will recognize that this is a genuine situation, and will be able to explains why ....

 

[Samoerai]

Walking around Jakarta for a short distance less than 1km (say). You would not believe it until you know the reason why and you see the terrain....

During his recent visit to Jakarta, a person approached the hotel reception seeking directions to a nearby shopping mall. Despite the apparent proximity on the map, when he inquired, "How far is it on foot?" the receptionist's eyes widened in astonishment. Walk ?? It seemed she couldn't fathom the idea of a 'bule' choosing to walk.

Another story:
A tourist unfamiliar with the bustling streets of Jakarta embarked on a leisurely stroll from Senayan Plaza to the nearby Mulia Hotel, a distance of merely less than one kilometer. Unbeknownst to him, his casual walk transformed him into an impromptu Pied Piper, captivating a group of urchins who trailed behind him like a devoted entourage. This unusual spectacle baffled a vigilant security guard, who rushed across the street to extricate the disoriented tourist from the growing crowd, exclaiming with concern, "Pak, you don't walk around here."

Those familiar with the Indonesian people and the geography of Jakarta will recognize that this is a genuine situation, and will be able to explains why ....

Aside that these are not jokes. These are perfect examples of the "gengsi" culture in Indonesia. Only the lower class walks, higher class will take the car, even when the mall or hotel are close by. Actually I did walk from Mulia Hotel to the golf court. And from the golf court to Plaza Senayan .. with my golf bag .. I don't fear losing my face or gengsi (prestige/class).

In an earlier post, i think it was in the thread "no indonesian culture" I asked why Indonesians will not hold the door for you, while clearly you are behind them .. the answer was that Indonesians will not do small favours. That is actually not the reason. This also relates to gengsi. Holding the door for you, is a lower class "job" e.g. for the doorman or satpam.

 

[pantaiema]

Aside that these are not jokes. These are perfect examples of the "gengsi" culture in Indonesia. Only the lower class walks, higher class will take the car, even when the mall or hotel are close by. Actually I did walk from Mulia Hotel to the golf court. And from the golf court to Plaza Senayan .. with my golf bag .. I don't fear losing my face or gengsi (prestige/class).

In an earlier post, i think it was in the thread "no indonesian culture" I asked why Indonesians will not hold the door for you, while clearly you are behind them .. the answer was that Indonesians will not do small favours. That is actually not the reason. This also relates to gengsi. Holding the door for you, is a lower class "job" e.g. for the doorman or satpam.

It might be a matter of "gengsi," but it's crucial to consider that this pertains to 'bule,' residing outside Indonesia, not Indonesian individuals or bule who get used to Jakarta terrain. In their home countries, people are accustomed to walking several kilometers or even running on the streets.

However, it's evident that Jakarta's residents, particularly Indonesians, don't engage in such activities. If they seek exercise, they opt for venues like stadiums, parks, squares, or gyms.

To walk or run on Jakarta's streets, one must be familiar with the terrain and equipped with durable hiking boots to protect your feet and knees. Navigating through muddy or swampy areas, characterized by wet, sticky mud, urine, or even human feces.

Moreover, the sidewalk, the pavement when present, is frequently utilized as a road by people. This situation is compounded for pedestrians by the existence of street vendors and construction activities. There's even the danger of being hit by 'ojek,'. The areas might be cluttered with palettes carrying nails, broken glasses, remnants from street vendors and construction work.

 

[Bob]

These last few jokes are really lame. Although 'hiking boots to protect your knees' was mildly amusing.

 

[harryopal1]

 

[pantaiema]

These last few jokes are really lame. Although 'hiking boots to protect your knees' was mildly amusing.

Correction, high cut hiking boots to protect your ankle.
But in the extreme condition you might need a knee boots, a horse and you become a Jockey. Jockey, horse, knee boot are actually the perfect combination showing you are very serious in navigating around the terrain avoiding nails from palette, muddy or swampy areas, urines, feces.

 

[pantaiema]

View attachment 3619

He might need a knee boots and a horse so they could continue the game to match this giant

 

[vocalneal]

To walk or run on Jakarta's streets, one must be familiar with the terrain and equipped with durable hiking boots to protect your feet and knees. Navigating through muddy or swampy areas, characterized by wet, sticky mud, urine, or even human feces.

Oh so you have been to the Hash have you

 

[snpark]

Or the clientele of blok M
Human faeces indeed

 

[vocalneal]

I've never been to Block M but I imagine I've been to similar places. Is the four floors in Sing. the same?

 

[snpark]

Four floors of whores?

 

[Helpful Herbert]

I've never been to Block M but I imagine I've been to similar places. Is the four floors in Sing. the same?

It was a bit like that until about 10 years ago. But now it is mostly deserted, and it is being converted into other uses, not bars.

 

[pantaiema]

I've never been to Block M but I imagine I've been to similar places. Is the four floors in Sing. the same?

It used to be place for shopping, entertainment (for ayam ) and the Hub for Bus Public Transport in Jakarta. Now it is becoming less popular

 

[snpark]

He means jalan fatmawati
Backpackers street

 

[Helpful Herbert]

When Top Gun closed in around 2018, that was the beginning of the end for JL Falatehan (blok m), not sure if I spelt that right

 

[Samoerai]

Back to the jokes ... here is another one. Some influencer (don't know which one) recommended a cake "cromboloni" at mr. Spoon a few days ago ... But maybe I should post this video in "Wonders and curiosities" as one of the effects of gengsi?

It is a lot of "baloney". Check it out on TikTok di sini ...

TikTok - Make Your Day

 

[Samoerai]

Today in the news in The Netherlands .. who won first price for bad slogans?

A rental shop for bikes.
"Put the fun between your legs".

Second place for a pet shop advertising cat food.
"Everything for stuffing your pussy"

Yes, the Dutch speak English very well.
Really happened after boarding a plane. A group of business people sat down. Then a Dutch lady stood up and left for the bathroom, saying " I quickly going to change my panty".

Note: In the Netherlands "panty" means .. stockings.

Also really happened. His business is to breed horses. When asked he said: "I fok horses".

Note: "fokken" is Dutch for "to breed".

And the most funny part of that conversation, was when the English speaking man asked: "Excuse me?"
The Dutch guy said: "Yes, horses!"

 

[Bob]

He means jalan fatmawati
Backpackers street

? That's Jl Jaksa or did that change?

 

[snpark]

well the lane with top gun etc in it anyway