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- Nov 6, 2016
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Back in Yogya I've become friends with the person I rent from when here, they're an expat who teaches at a local university. Having a catch-up coffee together it was explained the Indonesian partner has found themselves in a lot of debt through bad financial decisions in recent years causing some stress for them.
My friend has a prenup that distinguishes financial status before the marriage as well as separating earnings while they're married (I have no idea of exact details or legal status of the prenup) Although my friend has the capacity to alleviate some of the financial debt, they're somewhat reticent to do so as there's the likelihood of the partner continuing to dig financial holes for themselves as this person is just hopeless with get rich quick ideas and the like.
My advice was don't step in at all as a lesson has to be learned, and if they were to bail their partner out, it will be setting a precedent for further bail-out requests in the future. It will also lessen their own financial position. Most expats I know, mostly male, have a hidden bank account for themselves and very strict rules in their marriage or relationship where money is concerned so as to ward against issues.
I do wonder sometimes why so many Indonesians find money management so difficult. The Indonesians I know who struggle with money management generally either have no long term plan living only for the day, or suffer chronically from keeping up appearances which finds them constantly buying new phones,gadgets, cars and other crap that they can't afford or don't really need.
My friend has a prenup that distinguishes financial status before the marriage as well as separating earnings while they're married (I have no idea of exact details or legal status of the prenup) Although my friend has the capacity to alleviate some of the financial debt, they're somewhat reticent to do so as there's the likelihood of the partner continuing to dig financial holes for themselves as this person is just hopeless with get rich quick ideas and the like.
My advice was don't step in at all as a lesson has to be learned, and if they were to bail their partner out, it will be setting a precedent for further bail-out requests in the future. It will also lessen their own financial position. Most expats I know, mostly male, have a hidden bank account for themselves and very strict rules in their marriage or relationship where money is concerned so as to ward against issues.
I do wonder sometimes why so many Indonesians find money management so difficult. The Indonesians I know who struggle with money management generally either have no long term plan living only for the day, or suffer chronically from keeping up appearances which finds them constantly buying new phones,gadgets, cars and other crap that they can't afford or don't really need.