Mixed Marriage outside of Indonesia


Well-Known Member
Sep 30, 2016
Except that Uber voucher is no longer good in Indonesia. :)

I went to BATS for my birthday 4 or 5 years ago with my wife. I had a $100 voucher, and wanted to try their huge steak. I didn’t see any ladies that appealing...
Never take steak to a BBQ!!


Mr. 10,000
Jul 31, 2016
Sapi <> Ayam

On marriage abroad; don't underestimate the convenience of doing it in the WNA's home country. There you get the docs more easily, know the procedures, no language barrier, you have easier access to the embassy (KBRI). Of course the restricting factor is access for the WNI...
Last edited:


New Member
Feb 15, 2020
Getting married in Bangkok, mixed marriage; nationality and religion...
Originally posted elsewhere :26-07-12, 15:48

I will be flying off to Bangkok in a few days time to get married.
I have been asked if I would make a thread about what is involved, the pitfalls, the bureaucracy and just the experience in general.
So here we go...
I am a UK citizen of no particular religious persuasion- however I am betting that I will have to state something ... I was raised as a Christian in my early years so I am assuming that will be the easy option.
I will be marrying an Indonesian man of Islamic faith.

So far it has not been plain sailing because his documents were lost, so we have had to do the rounds getting a new KTP, birth certificate and passport.

However, this process has taken less than a month- I'm still getting over the shock of that... I have not asked him, however I suspect that maybe some cash changed hands to expedite the process (better I don't know about this).
We finally collected his passport on the 25th of July.

We had to get some documents together to give to the Indonesian embassy in Bangkok (obviously)
The documents that he needed are known as N1, N2, N3 and N4... obtainable from the kelurahan (don't ask me too many details about this- I left that part to him once I told him what was needed.
There is also another document that he had to sign (not so sure exactly what it is- however) I believe it to be a statement of being free to marry legitimately (these are essentials- get them done before you go to Thailand- it saves time money and heartache).
I as a UK citizen have to go to the embassy with my passport (and maybe my birth certificate) and a completed copy of a form that is downloadable from the UK embassy in Bangkok site.

Why Bangkok?
1;In essence there is no required residency pre wedding, however in actual practice the process with the Indonesian embassy in Bangkok is likely to take a minmum of 6 working days- apparently because we are of differing faiths. (3 days if of the same faith- however if that was the case I would probably not go out of the country in the first place).
2; It is cheaper for hotels than Singapore too.
3; Neither of us have visited it before.

So we have booked 2 full weeks there.

I will add to this thread as the process unfolds - who knows, I could have got it all wrong and it could just end up being a holiday...
One of the best pieces of advice I once got from a forum member... "expect nothing much, except that, if it can go wrong it will go wrong and that way you will not have the stress and disappointment".

So- let's see if I come back from just a nice holiday or as a "Mrs Squirrel'.
Total cost so far [NB: these are 2012 prices]
There is a budget of 20juta IR for the whole thing- plus spending/shopping money in Bangkok

The flights were 5.7 juta (most definitely cheaper at other times of the year)
I had to extend the stay due to 2 days public holiday - so had to change the flights... 800,000IR

The hotel cost approximately £390 (pounds sterling) for 10 nights - that is for a suite in a 4 star hotel.
I got a 55% discount on the hotel.
(it pays to shop around)

Cost of new passport for the hubby to be 250,000IR
This is where it gets a bit sketchy... cost of replacement KTP and birth certificate for hubby to be...not sure- but less than 1juta IR.
Cost to Indonesian embassy will be $20 US
Cost at UK embassy will be £65 pounds sterling (The £65 is what the UK embassy charges for signing and stamping the affirmation of freedom to marry document).
Transport to and from the airport, private driver and car... expensive but 1.5 juta (Bluebird group quoted 875,000 each way plus tolls and parking)
The cost of a prenup= 1.1jutaIR including 2 notarised copies... this was drawn up and signed in the same day- we had some interesting quotes re price and length of processing time for this... from 900,000IR to 25juta IT from 2 hours to 2 months.
I just went for the convenience of the one who did it while we waited, it took 2 hours.

So far it has cost in the region of £1000 sterling.
So I think I am on or below budget...


Update from Bangkok...

Arrived safe and sound, lesson number 1 learned, do not exchange Indonesian Rupiahs at the airport... ridiculous rates.
UK embassy (on Wireless road), a total breeze, be prepared for a bag search before entry and be prepared to have to leave electronic items at the main gate- hand-phones, cameras, laptops etc.
Go to the consular section and press the screen on the information point, it generates a ticket number, wait for your number to be called.
Hand in the form and show passport wait of 30 minutes then go to next window, sign form and they sign and stamp it- cost = £65
All nice and simple walk away with official document.

Then go to Indonesian embassy... press bell on gate then enter.
There were no security measures and no organised system of waiting- first come first served. (this could well have changed by now).
However - here is where our problems started... the information we had states that parental permission not necessary for over 20yr old.
Hahahaha ok- my informant was very much mistaken, in regards to the the idiot we had to deal with.

So we had to contact Bandung and get this permission letter signed by parents and stamped officially - I think by the RT.
The embassy told us that an email of this document would be acceptable...so, next day we returned with the copy of the document.
Nope - now a copy is no good- they now want the original... sigh.
However they did say that they would begin processing the papers and that it will be ok if we show the document when we go to collect.
The process cost =$20 US
So currently sat waiting for an express overnight TNT delivery to my hotel.
Tomorrow is a national holiday here in Thailand... so if the document arrives we take it in on Friday.

Should all go to plan on Friday - we collect the papers and then get translations in to Thai of my papers and of his, then we take them to the Ministry of Foreign Affairs. This process takes a few hours apparently...
It is entirely possible that I will be married on Monday or Tuesday... Then its back to the Indonesian Embassy to register the marriage with them. My informant told me it would take a few days to do this... however the man at the embassy (consular desk) told me "no, it is only 1 day".
Will cross that bridge when we come to it.
The upshot of the parental permission issue is that the guy at the Indonesian Embassy in Bangkok refused to issue the papers without the permission despite my intended being well over 30 years of age.
Never mind; thankfully UPS has delivered the document today...
We have to return to the embassy on Friday with this document. Then we have to go and get translations and go the the MOFA ... so we are going to be way later than the opening time... if we even get there on Friday- am guessing the "wedding" is likely to be on Monday (if we are lucky) or Tuesday.
Now I have a question about the signature of both parents. I am a grandpa of 65 years old. My parents are long dead. How I solve this ?


New Member
Feb 15, 2020
Haha no worries. I remember a bit of your story with how your hubby needed permission from his parents. Hahaha, I'll be waiting to read your story, much more lively than mine.
I have also a question over signature from my parents because they asked me this to.
I am a grandfather of 65 years old.
My parents are LONG dead. My mother in died in 1978 and is burried in south Africa. my father left when I was 3 years old.And died somewhere and is burried somwhere in 2011. Still they say I needd document with their signatures. How you can solve this??


Mr. 10,000
Jul 31, 2016
Officially it's up to 30 years old. So I would just ignore it. (Mention Non Applicable.)


Well-Known Member
Charter Member
Jul 16, 2016
The required signature is for the Indonesian person so that they can get the permit to marry.
Ferdy states they are Dutch, so their question is irrelevant.
I assume if parents are deceased that the RT/RW sign a statement to say so.
It was 8 years since I got married in Thailand,things may have changed at the Indonesian embassy there, I suggest you check things out independently. Look for more recent info.

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