genuine interaction with ppl, is it possible?

abel majeed

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May 29, 2019
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Is it true that foreigners are almost always looked at as having more money and able to give etc. Its hard to hv any genuine friendship with ppl who carry even the slightest of that kind of mindset. I know you could set limits etc but its not the same..they money thing will always hang like a cloud over yr head.
It can be really annoying as u keep experiencing it and thinking about it

Could you guys tell me how often these things happen or how common in indonesis outside of big cities like jakarta rtc.

1. Kids steeling stuff. Like a toy in yr bckyard or a ssndwitch on restaurant table while u arr in the bathroon..take ur helmet from yr bike , kids throwing rocks, . Neighbor kids visiting you to play with yr kids but spent most time watching around whst u hv in the house telling their parents later what they saw (they hv two fridges, big screen tv, somtimes seeing sometimes seeing something and ask you if you can give it to them

2. Ppl sitting next to you in bus and looking what you resding on yr fone

Neighbors and friends ask u lo lend them some big money ss a loan or if uou vsn them a fone

Ppl telling u to give them a ride bz they re tired something they never ask to a local even if they are rich

After seeing yr face Stop and think b4 they gv u prices of things they are s
selling.

I think all of this happens everywhere to sm degree in poor countries but how bad is it in indonesia?

Could a foreigner live far from any neighbors snd still feel safe?
 

snpark

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If this sort of stuff worries you then I think Indonesia is not the place for you
 

abel majeed

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if its very common, it might bother me to some degree especially if steeling is common among kids. those crrstures we all want to nice to to win their heartïs.and it would be a negative. thx for yr reply
 

BPNBound

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i find walking fast with purpose and a determined look on my face helps :)
 

lifelongexpat

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Perhaps living in a guarded complex, having a chauffer driven car and only frequenting 5* hotels/high end malls would suit you best.
 

BPNBound

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Perhaps living in a guarded complex, having a chauffer driven car and only frequenting 5* hotels/high end malls would suit you best.
I dont know... i find when I frequent the 5* hotels is when I get the most attention!
 

abel majeed

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didn't mean by my original post that if such things existed that it would be such a big deal that because. of it I we shy away or its a killer but just wanted to get a feel and it does bother me to some degree nonetheless. because. we are generally very social esp my kids and I noticed in past that they feel awkward if often ppl show so clearly thoughts that we might be a bank or handing out stuff despite the fact we don't hv anything fancy in our lives. that kind of mundset is really bothersome .
 

Will_M

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I can honestly say I’ve never had a sandwich stolen in Indonesia.

I also think “bule prices” only tend to exist in tourist hot spots.
 

jstar

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I've seen a huge amount of theft of tools by workers, lots of things taken away by maids, etc. etc. I even had some (installed!) insect screen door lock & handles taken away in my current house after having two electricians do some work upstairs. But in Europe I've seen much more pickpocketing on the street and (attempts for) skimming etc. So it's everywhere.

Let's face it, a foreigner will always stick out as sore thumb, unless they get 'used' to you. And even then. If that is a major problem, it's better to stay in one's own country I guess.
 

Helpful Herbert

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On the positive side they smile a lot more at foreigners than they do at other Indonesians, which is nice. I've also never had a sandwich stolen, in fact I've never come across an Indonesian who would even want to eat a sandwich.
 

abel majeed

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sounds terrible..so sad...maids sterling, electricians takin tools..maybe they could also tell others what they saw in house and encourage em to watch your house and come back some other time to brake in...when u dealing with a mind set like that.. it's hard..at the same time if take steps of caution they see it and it comes across as lack of trust since u don't know who might a cheat who is not..u will hurt the feelings of some in the process...I know it's manageable and no one is forcing us to live there but it's a big negative for a mentality like that...I think it is common behavior from what am hearing and there no excuse to be like that, poverty is not excuse..I know an Indonesian family who purchase vacation packages to go to the middle east about 150 juts from a known agency whose headquarters is in Jakarta..they never traveled they kept getting lied to with dozens of other couples..the affiliated agency at the end told them that the manager took the money and purchased a property and is try in to sell it and as soon as he sell they get their vacation or their money back...this is 3 yrs ago and still nothin.......
 

harryopal

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We shouldn't be surprised at theft when even the biggest corporations and institutions are found to be engaging in bribery fraud and all manner of unethical and illegal practices. An enquiry into the Australian banking system has shown millions of dollars stolen by banks by spreading dishonest practices across client accounts. Yet for all that I have found even in the poorest countries most people are honest and go out of their way to be helpful.

As as foreigner it is automatically assumed we are all rich which we are in countries where some people earn just a few dollars a day or are unemployed without social security and the choice may seem to be to steal or starve. So while we need to take care we can still be appreciative of those many kind and good people who are around us.
 

fastpitch17

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All depends on where you live. Maybe more details on your plans with where and what you will be involved in work wise. I mostly found that if you are nice to the kids, they look out for you.
 

jstar

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What is a much bigger issue than petty theft for me personally, is in fact described in the title of this thread.

And I blame it mainly on the language. It is so basic and simple, that it becomes limiting and almost impossible to be used as a vehicle for deeper and more substantial discussions (and discourses). But there are definitely cultural differences as well; in sense of humor, view of democracy, opinions on values and morals in society, general behavior, etc.
 

harryopal

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The word "mai" in Thai has six different meanings depending tone so I daresay that while Indonesian is very basic there is a lot conveyed in other subtleties of pitch, range and context that would take many years to grasp. Any linguists here to enlighten us?
 

colroe

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I can honestly say I’ve never had a sandwich stolen in Indonesia.

I also think “bule prices” only tend to exist in tourist hot spots.
Maybe I am careless, but I have had hand phone and wallet stolen, money in drawers stolen, tools and household items stolen, bike helmets stolen, jewellery stolen, laptop stolen etc. 2 of the motorbike helmets are my fault, left unattended on bike, hand phone and wallet taken by visitors to my home, laptop, jewellery, money taken by thieves entering the housr tricking my maid by posing as Telcom workers, tools and other items from garage taken by wife's brother in law while he was painting the house!! I should be more careful, but to what extent does being careful extend to? Must everything be locked up in a safe while others are in your home?
 

jstar

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...while Indonesian is very basic there is a lot conveyed in other subtleties of pitch, range and context that would take many years to grasp....
Not to mention there is a different (in)formal Bahasa also.

Don't forget that many people speak other languages at home, not BI. And try to become proficient in Javanese, Hokkien, Sundanese or so, as well...that's just too much esp. when you're a certain age.
 
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abel majeed

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May 29, 2019
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I know it is what it is and no one is holdin a gun to our heads to live in indonesia but sounds bad and that's what was being asked in original post. no one is questioning these things can happen anywhere Sep third world countries but if u hv to lock up everything every time sm 1 visit you..it looks bad to the other n they may resent you but if I don't do it u get roped drip by drip. it can turn into a stressful situation...not good for mental health. sm1 said they had some insta
lled stuff got stolen by sm1 who was given permission to enter yr house..so maybe next thing I know they will unscew yr Fosset and run even worse steel yr shaving raiser or yr underwear from the laundry basket
 

Helpful Herbert

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What kind of people do you invite into your house?? We only invite friends/family, and for workmen there would be someone close by supervising them. Maids have to be by personal recommendation through family. We've never had anything stolen in 10 years.
 

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